San Antonio Standard

A military mother of two sons, one with special needs, is finishing up her first year of home schooling her children and says she is one of many in her neighborhood who have turned to the practice as an alternative to public school.

"I have considered home schooling my older son at various points since we moved to San Antonio," Melissa Schumacher told the San Antonio Standard. "There were two moments that solidified our decision to home school. The first happened in May 2020 after stay-at-home orders were lifted and we were finally able to pick up school supplies for both of my sons.  

"At the time, I had one son in a general education 1st grade class and my other was in 2nd grade but in a special education (ALE/life skills) classroom. After I unpacked both of their bags, I realized my son who received special education services had very little to show. I put the two side-by-side and took a picture. Even his crayon box was untouched, except for one brown crayon. We have spent a fair amount of money during our time in Texas on special education advocates so to see visually what education my son was receiving [or not receiving] left me distraught."

Aside from that experience of seeing her special needs son's lack of progress, she knew that with the COVID-19 pandemic some of his services would not be granted. The defining moment for Schumacher to home school came in August 2020, a few weeks before school was beginning.

"With the school year approaching, I had a lengthy conversation with a special education director for our district," she said. "There were so many questions he could not answer – which meant teachers did not have answers, nor could teachers be planning. It is critical for teachers to plan but especially for special education teachers.  

"I was verbally told that most of the critical pieces of my son’s IEP [individualized education program] that we had fought for over the years would not be guaranteed and certain processes – like ARD meetings – would not be granted during COVID. Some of those critical pieces were access to sensory room, sensory equipment, general education inclusion, and the school district not purchasing online access for my son’s research-based reading program that was decided by the ARD committee. In spring 2020 we had purchased the $120 online program [Edmark] for my son to continue his reading program. Special education has been a fight but it just became too uncertain to continue to fight during a pandemic." 

Schumacher said it made the most sense to home school both her sons. Indeed, she said, many in her neighborhood chose to home school so the options to meet friends for playdates and socialize were present.

"While it was an easy decision to home school my older son, it was much easier to choose home school for my younger son because so many other families in our neighborhood also chose to home school this year," Schumacher said. "We attended one of the largest elementary schools in Northside ISD, the largest district in San Antonio and the fourth largest district in the state of Texas. Many of these families are military or have a child with special needs or both. We connect on a Facebook group and have regular park playdates, Valentines’ parties, pool meet-ups and more."

Schumacher said she and her husband intentionally limit screen time for their sons so "to switch from limiting electronics to using electronics many hours a day for schoolwork wasn't ideal. We try to be active outside as much as possible so the shift to virtual school in spring 2020 was really frustrating for both of my kids."

What it is like to be a military home school mother?

"Well, we are military, plus home school, plus special needs," she said. "I will say that in Texas home schooling is the easiest of these three. It is much easier to be a military home school mom than it is to be a military special education mom. There is support and community with home school in our neighborhood, in our city, in our church. I have never felt alone and have plenty of support when I have had questions, needed advice, or just needed to get out for a play date. I have been surprised about the abundance of options available for special education home schooling."

One of the reasons Schumacher chose not to home school earlier was because her husband traveled frequently. School provided stability for her children and afforded her time to take care of all the other responsibilities when her husband was away.

"COVID changed our situation dramatically," she said. "My husband was supposed to spend a year separated from our family but COVID changed that and he was able to stay home. It gave us the security to finally move forward. I don’t know if I could continue to homeschool if my spouse were back in a job with a high tempo or a lot of travel. I know that because of these reasons some military families want to home school but can’t."

Schumacher said her family's experience with special education in San Antonio did not go well.

"One of our family mottos is 'Begin well, end well.' We have lots of new beginnings and endings," she said. "Our goal as parents is to make sure those new beginnings are as successful as possible. We plan before we move. We make lists and check them twice. When things out of our control make a new beginning rocky, we defer to another family motto – 'Just add ice cream.'''

She added, "We want all the transitions our kids go through to be as smoother as possible. We did not have a good beginning with our special education experience when we moved to San Antonio. There was no amount of ice cream we could add. We made plenty of requests for help and support from base level resources at Joint Base San Antonio but support for military families who receive special education services has been a struggle. When our families move frequently in service to our nation--our kids need robust support, especially school-age children. But the struggles with education in public school is one side of the coin and the other side of the coin is the ease of support and robustness of support for home schooling [in Texas]." 

Both her children take swim lessons and her younger son is an orange belt in karate. With COVID-19 restrictions easing, Schumacher said she will be looking into additional activities and co-ops for them.